Lean Into the Weird: My Non-Traditional Journey to Motherhood

If we tried to “act” like we were traditional or normal, it would break us. Instead, we lean into our differences...

Every time I hear my kids call me by my first name, it’s a gentle reminder of the non-traditional way we found each other. Years of infertility and trying to make my own babies turned out to be a path I wasn’t meant to walk. Instead, I made a decision—any child who came into my home would be at home.

Over six years, I fostered three different sibling groups. The kids ranged from as young as 3 months old to 8 years old. Some sibling sets were two, others three. Can you imagine going from zero to three kids overnight? It’s like getting hit by a freight train. Life without kids was calm, peaceful, maybe even boring. Life with kids? There’s always something to do, someone to feed, someone to love. It’s beautiful, but it’s also chaos.

Eventually, I was able to adopt my kids. They are a blessing I never could have dreamed of -- and they saved me from my sheepish self. There’s something about kids that brings out the mama bear in you—they help you see yourself and your journey in a new light.

I didn’t know my path would turn out this way. Sometimes, I still feel a twinge of sadness that I don’t have biological children. There may always be a small part of me that mourns the idea of a child calling me “Mom” in that idyllic, storybook way. But I’ve come to love the unique story we have and the relationship I’m building with my kids. We’re like wildflowers in a garden full of roses—different, unexpected, and entirely our own.

Being unique and owning our non-traditional relationship has been amazing. I think that’s the key. If we tried to “act” like we were traditional or normal, it would break us. Instead, we lean into our differences and embrace our weird.

That’s why I created Sometimes a Mom—for my non-traditional moms out there looking for connection. I see you because I am you. Let’s conquer this world together, one beautifully messy, unconventional day at a time.

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